March 14, 2016
[WP] The end is here. Well... the ends, rather. Everyapocalypse scenario has unfolded simultaneously, creating a delicate balancethat has kept civilization almost entirely intact, stable, and seemingly indestructible.
"This just in, it seems that when the Proto-organic beam from the alien spacecraft engaged with the already toxic atmosphere of the Earth it ignited the sky. Scientists - Well, the scientists that are left - are saying that it caused the radiation from the nuclear blasts that most of the major civilizations had detonated was reflected into the alien fleet. And though the alien craft are still in orbit we haven't been able to see any signs of life. Not that that matters Jan, because as you well know, there haven't been any signs of life on Earth for about a week now, but here we all are," said Tom, he smiled at the camera. His skin was roughly the color of day-old guacamole that had been left in the sun. His eyes, his pride and joy - the color of glacial ice, had long since clouded over with cataracts, but they didn't seem to affect his vision. Mike on the camera was in worse shape, with parts of his skin sloughing off as he took the live-shot. But he was still wearing the WMMT jacket, which contained the worst of it, and the headset had melded into the skin of his face as the nanites worked to repair the radiation damage as quickly as it happened. "Back to you, Jan."
"Thanks, Tom," said Jan. Her blonde hair was still perfectly coiffed, though her eyes had sunk back into their sockets considerably. The makeup she was wearing gave off the impression she was wearing an ill-made mask that was slipping off her face. But it was really just her face that was actually slipping off her skull.
"Word from Google is that their micro-technology has been working tirelessly to repair soft tissue from the ravages of radiation. However, we've just been told that our bodies are only able to tolerate the presence of these mini-robots because of the strange response the population had to the bio-agent known as Agent Jelly, that was introduced when Russia was able to launch the bio-hazardous material to key points in Europe, Africa, Canada and the United States. We're going to Tina, live... or whatever we're calling it now, outside of the capital crater. Tina?"
The shot cuts to a woman who is missing half of her face. When she speaks, a garble of syllables come out, that the nanites translate after a few moments. Techs at Google were kind enough to make the voice in everyone's head sound a little like yelling, so you wouldn't think you were insane. Most people hate it, but there's no one left to turn it off.
TRANSLATION: THANKS JAN, WE'RE LIVE OUTSIDE OF THE RUINS OF THE WHITEHOUSE. SURVIVING OFFICIALS CONFIRM THAT THE ASH FROM THE SUPERVOLCANO AT YELLOWSTONE WAS RESPONSIBLE FOR SATURATING OUR ATMOSPHERE WITH RADIATION THAT WAS IGNITED WHEN THE ALIENS ATTACKED. WITH THE LATEST THREAT DEALT WITH, SURVIVING WORLD LEADERS ARE CONVENING FOR AN EMERGENCY CONFERENCE. THIS IS TINA VANKMEER REPORTING. BACK TO YOU, JAN.
The screen flickers back to Jan, who nods at the viewers.
"Thank you Tina. Many leaders have expressed thanks that all of these disasters have come to light. President Biden released this statement:
The screen cuts to a text overlay as Jan reads.
"This has indeed been a trying time for our nation and the nations of the world. No one was prepared for the attacks and the eruptions to come in such rapid succession. Then when Aliens abducted so many world leaders, we knew we had to act. The golden lining is that, despite the high casualties, those who survive seem impervious to heat, cold, hunger and thirst. Which makes rebuilding that much easier.
"We've come to the strange conclusion that anyone who has survived this long seems to be unable to die. This world shall rebuild - and with the alien technology now at our disposal - we can make sure nothing like this ever happens again. Stay strong. God bless America."
The camera cut back to Jan, and she shuffled some papers on the desk.
"Now a word from our sponsors," she said.